johnnysmiles
Script created with Final Draft by Final Draft, Inc.

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               EXT. MODEST APARTMENT BUILDING - DAY

               A Porsche pulls up outside the building. "Walking on
               Sunshine" or some similarly obnoxiously upbeat tune is
               blaring from the car. 

               Behind the wheel is JOHNNY SMILES, late 20s. He taps on the
               steering wheel to the beat as the window WHIRS shut. 

               He exits the car, hits the remote, and notices a MAN walking
               by. 

                                   JOHNNY
                         Hey! Good Morning! Is it alright if
                         I park here? 

               The man shrugs.

                                   JOHNNY
                         Great!

               Johnny looks around and then consults a planner that's
               covered with SMILEY FACES. 

               He heads up a staircase to APARTMENT 12. 

               KNOCKS.

               A MAN, mid 30s, opens the door. Looks like he just woke up. 

                                   JOHNNY
                         Good morning! Dennis?

                                   DENNIS
                         Yeah. Who're you?

                                   JOHNNY
                         Johnny. 
                             (Off his non-reaction)
                         Johnny Smiles! 
                             (Again, nothing)
                         I work for Lou.

                                   DENNIS
                         Lou?

                                   JOHNNY
                         You know... Lou? The guy you owe 
                             (hushed)
                         Seven-Thousand dollars?

                                   DENNIS
                         You work for Lou?

                                   JOHNNY
                             (Goofy, jokey)
                         Hello? I think I just said that.

                                   DENNIS
                         I expected someone... different.

                                   JOHNNY
                         I get that a lot. Say, you mind if
                         I come in? It's a bit... unseemly
                         talking about these kind of things
                         standing in a doorway.

                                   DENNIS
                         Uhhh... sure...



               INT. DENNIS'S APARTMENT - CONTINUOUS

               Johnny enters and looks around at the cluttered mess of an
               apartment. 

                                   JOHNNY
                         So, Dennis... I'm really sorry for
                         intruding on your morning like
                         this...

                                   DENNIS
                         No, it's okay...

                                   JOHNNY
                         So, if you just give me the seven
                         grand, I won't take up any more of
                         your time.

                                   DENNIS
                         Yeah, that's the thing -I don't
                         exactly have seven grand. Here.
                         Now.

               Johnny sits on the couch and SIGHS loudly.

                                   JOHNNY
                         Okay, well, you can get it, right?
                         A trip to the bank? Borrow it from
                         a friend or relative?

                                   DENNIS
                         Not really...I...

                                   JOHNNY
                         This is not good, Dennis. Lou pays
                         you on time when you win, right?

                                   DENNIS
                         Yeah... it's just...I mean look
                         around, I'm not exactly wealthy
                         here...

                                   JOHNNY
                         Well, if you're placing bets you
                         can't cover, you've got a big
                         problem...

               Johnny reaches into his jacket. 

               Dennis looks nervous.

                                   DENNIS
                         Look. I know Lou must-

                                   JOHNNY
                         -it's called Gambling Addiction! I
                         see it all the time. Here, let me
                         give you this pamphlet about it. I
                         really think you should go to one
                         of the meetings. 

               Johnny slides the pamphlet across the coffee table. 

               A wave of relief washes over Dennis. 

                                   DENNIS
                             (picking up the pamphlet)
                         Oh, I will! I see now that I have a
                         problem.
                         I'm going to take care of it. You
                         can bet -COUNT! Count! You can
                         count on that. 

                                   JOHNNY
                         Good. I'm glad to hear that. 

               Dennis looks at Johnny who doesn't budge, just sits there
               SMILING at him. 

               Dennis looks around awkwardly. 

                                   DENNIS
                         So, y'know...Thank you for giving
                         me this information...SO much.

                                   JOHNNY
                         You're welcome!

               Johnny still doesn't move.

                                   DENNIS
                         Oh! So, tell Lou that I am really
                         grateful for his compassion and
                         understanding and...

               Johnny starts LAUGHING.

                                   JOHNNY
                         Ohh.. Ohh... Dennis, you didn't
                         think that just because you
                         admitted you have a problem that
                         your debt goes away, did you? This
                         isn't celebrity rehab. I don't look
                         like Dr. Drew do I? 
                             (laughing)
                         I'm sorry. I shouldn't laugh.
                         That's very insensitive of me. I
                         apologize. Besides admitting you've
                         got a problem is only the first
                         step. You have to take
                         accountability for it as well...
                         Granted, you're supposed to do that
                         on your own but...unfortunately,
                         I'm gonna have to help you with
                         that step.

               Dennis soaks this in. The realization that he's not off the
               hook sinks back in.

                                   DENNIS
                         Hey, you want a drink? I sure could
                         use one.

                                   JOHNNY
                         That's not another problem is it?
                         'Cause I didn't bring any A.A.
                         pamphlets.
                             (beat, laughs)
                         I'm just joshin' ya! Who can blame
                         you under the circumstances?! What
                         are ya havin'?

                                   DENNIS
                         Scotch on the rocks.

                                   JOHNNY
                         Sounds good. Make it two.

               Dennis heads into the kitchen. 

               INTERCUT KITCHEN/ LIVING ROOM

               Johnny notices a wooden frog sitting on the coffee table. He
               looks at it inquisitively.

               Dennis gets two glasses and fills them with ice.

               Johnny picks up the frog and examines it. 

               Dennis pours the Scotch.

               Johnny notices a stick-like piece in the frog's mouth comes
               out. He looks at that trying to figure out what it does.

               Dennis looks around nervously and takes a gun out of the
               kitchen drawer and tucks it in his pants, before grabbing the
               drinks and heading back. 



               LIVING ROOM

               Dennis returns and puts the drink on the table. 

               Johnny puts the frog down. 

                                   JOHNNY
                         Have a seat here on the couch and
                         we can figure out what to do about
                         this debt. 

               Dennis reluctantly sits on the couch next to Johnny.

                                   JOHNNY
                             (raising his glass)
                         Cheers.

               They clink the glasses and take a swig. 

                                   JOHNNY
                         Blended?

                                   DENNIS
                         Yeah. Can't really afford the
                         single malt.

                                   JOHNNY
                         Yeah. No, I understand.

                                   DENNIS
                         I tell ya, I have the worst luck
                         lately. I just lost my right
                         testicle to cancer and now this...

                                   JOHNNY
                         That sucks but... you've gotta stay
                         positive, look on the bright side.

                                   DENNIS
                         Of testicular cancer?

                                   JOHNNY
                         Yeah! You gotta see your scrotum as
                         half full not half empty. 
                             (beat)
                         Like Lance Armstrong, y'know?

                                   DENNIS
                         Uhhh... yeah... but y'know, it was
                         a lot of medical bills... and then
                         I blew the tranny in my truck. That
                         was five-hundred bucks-

                                   JOHNNY
                         -Shouldn't the Trannie have paid
                         YOU? 

                                   DENNIS
                         Huh?

                                   JOHNNY
                         I mean... OH! You mean you blew the
                         transmission in your truck! I
                         thought... Nevermind. Look, Dennis,
                         gambling is not the way to get
                         yourself out of debt. But I think
                         you realize that now.

               Johnny puts the glass down and picks up the frog again. He's
               trying really hard to figure out its function. 

               As Johnny is seemingly memorized by the frog- 

               Dennis slowly reaches behind him and takes out his gun.

                                   JOHNNY
                         Okay. I give up what does this frog
                         do?

               Dennis aims his gun at Johnny, who seems oblivious.

                                   JOHNNY
                         Oh wait. I know...

               In a FLASH- 

               Johnny CRACKS Dennis on the bridge of the nose with the frog
               and grabs the gun out of his hand. 

                                   JOHNNY
                         It's a weapon, right?

               Dennis MOANS and puts his hands over his nose.

                                   DENNIS
                         Ahh...Dude, that really hurt.

                                   JOHNNY
                         You pulled a gun on me, Dennis.

                                   DENNIS
                         I know.. But still...owwww...

                                   JOHNNY
                         That was a bad idea. I may not look
                         like much but I'm an expert in
                         several martial arts. Some you've
                         never even heard of... like "Lazy
                         Seahorse Karate".
                             (beat, laughing)
                         Okay. I made that one up. 
                             (more laughing)
                         Look, Dennis, this problem isn't
                         going to go away. You have to find
                         your inner strength and deal with
                         it in a positive way.
                             (RE: the gun)
                         This? Not very positive.

                                   DENNIS
                         I'm sorry. I just...I don't have
                         seven grand...

                                   JOHNNY
                         Okay... Well, how much do you have?

                                   DENNIS
                         I can get half if I can go to the
                         bank.

                                   JOHNNY
                         Okay. Well, half is better than
                         none. If you give me half today, I
                         can give you another week to come
                         up with the other half.

               Johnny sighs with relief.

                                   JOHNNY
                         Of course, I'll have to break your
                         leg. 
                             (off his reaction,
                              shrugging)
                         Sorry...

                                   DENNIS
                         Couldn't you just break my pinkie
                         or something?

                                   JOHNNY
                         Pinkie is for like 500 bucks or
                         less, a few grand is definitely leg
                         range. Again, sorry.

                                   DENNIS
                         Can I have another glass of Scotch
                         first?

                                   JOHNNY
                         Sure! 
                             (beat)
                         I'll get it. Just in case you've
                         got a set of ginsu knives in there
                         you're fixing on grabbing.

               Johnny heads into the kitchen, still holding the gun, and
               returns with the bottle a moment later.

                                   JOHNNY
                         And I'll tell ya what else I'll do
                         for ya, since I like you... I'll
                         let you pick which leg I break. 

               Dennis manages a weak smile as he pours himself another
               drink. 

                                   JOHNNY
                             (motioning towards the
                              frog with the gun)
                         So, really, what does that thing
                         do?

               Dennis sighs and picks up the frog. He takes the stick out
               its mouth and rubs it across the frog's back. It makes a frog
               croaking-like sound.

                                   JOHNNY
                             (pleased)
                         Ohhh! It makes a frog sound! Cute.

                                                               FADE TO:



               INT. LARGE ROOM - NIGHT

               Dennis, on crutches, with a cast on his leg, HOBBLES forward
               with determination. 

               There are several people in folding chairs watching as--

               Dennis reaches the front of the room and stands behind a
               PODIUM. 

               He leans his crutches against the side of the podium and
               clears his throat. 

                                   DENNIS
                         Hi. My name is Dennis and I'm a
                         gambling addict.

                                   EVERYONE
                         Hi Dennis.

               From the back of the room, Johnny Smiles with a donut in his
               hand, smiles proudly and gives him a big THUMBS UP. 

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Script created with Final Draft by Final Draft, Inc.